Weird night!

I am sitting here, seeing lightning all over, while we sit surrounded by still several feet of snow. I know, and have seen and experienced, thunder snow, but this is different. There is nothing coming down, a huge amount of wind, and this huge lightning going on. Not the little sticks of lightning, but the kind that just lights up the sky. It seems almost eerie, like something out of a horror movie! What a not nice thought!!!!

I had the most interesting talk with a dear friend today - first of all, it was so nice to be able to talk about some of the details of our lives and hear that we are both struggling with some of the same things - kids, behaviors, shaping character, and on and on. Doesn't change what we are dealing with, but does help put it in some perspective. But, what really got me thinking, was that she was stating that she doesn't know who she is. She is so and so's wife, so and so's mom, a homeschooling mom, a farm wife, a Sunday school worker (or whatever), and on and on. But who is she when those roles are completed? I have to admit that I not only didn't have an answer for her, it really made me realize that this is the way I am feeling, the reason I find it so hard to be not working outside the home anymore. I am my kids' mom (a good thing), my husband's wife (another good thing), an adoptive mom, a homeschooling mom, a farm wife, a 4H parent, and on and on. But who am I? Are we separate from what we do? Yes and no. Is that why it makes me so crazy when things aren't going well in one area of my life? Because that is a portion of who I am? Hmmmm. I am going to need to ruminate on it. Each time I try to come up with something, I end up describing what I do! I take care of this, that and the other thing. I hope to be a published author someday, but once again, I think that describes what I do rather than who I am. Maybe I am looking at this the wrong way, I will need to think on it.

On another hand, I need to think about how we live out our faith. Are we Christians who go to church when we are supposed to an leave it at the door? I sure hope not, I know that we work very very hard on this. We go to church regularly because Christ does tell us to fellowship with other believers and support each other, as well as to continue to learn. So, we go. And we are active in the church, serving in various areas, actually nearly every member of the family! The kids too! Okay, but what about outside of the church? As the hands and feet of Christ, are we actively reaching out to do what He would have us do? Do we stop when someone is stuck in the ditch, and no one is there? Do we hand on things to those that need them? Do we take a moment to speak in kindness to the harried clerk, the nursing assistant dealing with a difficult patient, to lend a hand to the mom with a baby and a toddler? What about to the person who cuts us off in traffic, to the friend down the road who is having a hard time, to be a listening ear? We all have gifts, little or big. Pastor Mark spoke on the parable of the talents today, and it really brought home again that we have to use what we have. Whatever it is. It makes me so sad to see those who profess to follow Christ, refuse to be the hands and feet. They don't seem to understand that we live out our faith in what we do. We are saved by GRACE, but we demonstrate our faith through works. If we accept that Grace, which is all that Christ asks us to do, that is good. That is great. That is what God wants from us. But, if we are so saved, so redeemed, so grateful, then what do we do with that - I found myself facing that same question after I watched the Passion of the Christ in the theatre. If Christ did all of that, for me, who didn't deserve it, then what do I do with that? I can't just leave it. But that is all that Christ asks of me. On the other hand, we demonstrate our faith through our works. We are called to do for the "least of these" as we would for Christ. The verses in Matthew 24, verses 42 through 45 state it very clearly from the mouth of Christ.

What we do for others, we are doing for our Lord. How many times I have tried to tell my husband that the love and caring he shows for our children, is over and above what he shows for me, it touches me more than if he had done it for me. If that is how I feel, how must God feel? How must it touch his heart when we do something kind for someone else, just because? Even if it makes no sense to me, but just because I can? The little things seem to often count as much as the big ones, and we never see the way it is paid forward. I have to tell you, the little things people have done for me, for no reason, but just because, are such a huge gift. We have been so blessed to be gifted throughout this last season in our lives, adopting our sons and all, so many people came forward to make it happen and still ask how they can help. There have been days where I am struggling, and someone just does something little, even just caring and asking, and it can turn my whole day around. Think of what we could do!!!!! We can do that for others!!!

If each one of us were to do something, think of what we could do!!! We could change the world!!! Just with little things!!! But there is so much that we don't do, because it might put us out, or might be ... Unusual or whatever!!! Sometimes we just cannot see to extend grace to others, and we have been granted so much!!!! Sorry, I am on a rant. We were on our way to church this morning, were flagged down by a man who had his truck stuck on the edge of the road in the snow. I am proud to say that my dear hubby stopped to see if he could help. He tried to push it out, couldn't get it out. We thought we would head down the road a mile to our church, borrow a shovel and a couple guys and go back to help. Well, I was so stunned that when I asked the men who were hanging around having coffee, the responses I got - "well, I can't go", "he must have been going to fast, that's what happens", turning away and what not. I finally got one guy to come by approaching him in front of his really big teenage son. They both came, but not until after I had been turned down by ten men!!!! What is wrong with this picture????? Is this how we are responding to the gift from God of grace?? I was so crushed. What do I say to my kids? We had just been talking about being the hands and feet of Christ (and this was about 45 minutes prior to service starting, so no one was remotely going to be late).

It really made me think about being the hands and feet. It requires getting your hands and feet dirty, using your skills, whatever they may be. Don't miss the chance to push Christ out of the ditch, OK? If I had walked in and told those men it was Christ or even our pastor, they all would have been there in a heartbeat. But because it was a stranger, there were no volunteers. HUH???? No wonder no one believes that it means anything when we say we are Christians!

Sorry, done with my rant, but this really gets to me. Maybe it is because I have always worked with kids with disabilities, or because I adopted kids who needed me, or because I have been a foster parent, or just because I like to tilt at windmills!!! If we are not producing fruit, then what are we doing? How are we thanking Christ? When someone gifts one of my kids, is kind to one of my kids, it is more powerful than being kind to me. Think how God must feel.

Hope anyone who reads this has a great night!!! Thanks for letting me rant and get it off my chest, now I can sleep tonight!!! LOL!
Christy
Mom to the tribe of five (so far)
wife to the best husband in the world!
hopefully honoring Christ!